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10 Things I Want My Veteran to Know

  • We may not have fought a war in a foreign country with you, but we will fight this war with you. It has been said that there is nothing like having a battle buddy because they always have your back. I may not have experienced that, but I will fight for you if you just let me.

  • I choose to be with you because I love you. I understand that there may be times that you cannot understand why I am still here. I am not here because I have to be. I am here because I choose to be here. I love you.

  • I did not go to basic training with you, so there are things that I do not understand. I have never been in battle, so I do not always understand your mindset. I was not taught to see the danger in every situation. I have never trained with the sole purpose of protecting myself and my unit. Talk to me so I may understand things a little better.

  • Do not be afraid to get attached to me. I cannot begin to understand the pain that you experienced during war. I know that you may have seen people you love and care about die. You may not want to experience that kind of loss or pain again, but I am here to show you what love is if you will let me.

  • I am proud of your military service. I know that you may have done and seen things that you are not proud of. You fought for our country. You did not choose what battles you fought. You may have been put into a situation where you had to take a life to protect yourself, your Battle Buddies or carry out your mission. You do not have to feel ashamed or guilty for your actions. You were doing your job. It does not define your heart. I wish you could see the person that I see.

  • Our home is a safe place not a battle zone. I know that you may not be able to completely leave the war behind you. Our home is not a battle zone. It is your safe place. I am willing to do what I can to make you feel safe in your own home,

  • I am willing to accept that you may not want or be able to share all the details of what you experienced with me. As much as I want to be part of your life and share everything with you. I am willing to respect that you may not want or be able to share what you experienced with me. I want you to know that if you are ready to share, I am willing to listen without judgement.

  • No one deserves PTSD. It does not define who you are. You did not ask for PTSD and you do not deserve it. You are not PTSD. You are the person that I love. You just happen to have PTSD and we can work around that together.

  • There are times I may get frustrated and say hateful things. I get frustrated from time to time. I may even say hateful things. I do not always mean them. Even though they might come across as I am directing them to you, it is usually the situation and my inability to communicate my frustration to you.

  • I cannot fully understand what you are going through, but I am not the enemy. I do not understand completely what you are going through. I need you to know I am not the enemy. I am here to help you walk through this. You may not know you need my help or even want it. I just want what is best for you. I have a hard time accepting that I cannot fix this or take it from you.

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